I forget the title of the post now, but somewhere in this blog is at least one rendition of the story around how Curtis Burton the Third and I took his Mom’s new silk sheets and used them to jump off of the third story of my house. I think one of them is: running To or from or both.

Mom was just pulling into the drive way as I flashed her a smile and made that particular leap of faith, and into the hands of God.

Grandad often said:

“you need stories to tell. you can tell them about other people, or they can tell them about you. you have that choice in your own life.”

when I signed-on as a firefighter (and, we also had to be EMT’s) while living in Louisville, Colorado, part of the fitness testing included climbing a one hundred foot ladder.

…I’m generally afraid of heights.

with about ten rungs to go I was thinking I liked the burn in my thighs, and I was also glad there weren’t any building this high in Louisville.

those details are less important today. one reason for that is my point for this post lay else where. in fact, I’m not likely to make any point, here, today. well… other than, contrary to the general belief of those people around me, and who have followed my adventures, I do have fear.

but, hell, boy, I face them.

I taught myself how to jump.

I also look at people in terms of groups. one of those groups are white guys in GoreTex and real Adventurers. the first lot are men (ish) who fulfill themselves by finding an adventure – climbers, kayakers, hikers – a solid group, possibly. but, it’s the second group that I’ll relate to most. those who have adventures in their everyday lives – firemen, soldiers, survivors, entrepreneurs, Dads who hug their kids in public and cry when they score goals, etc.

by the way… two small things, really. the only vehicle I currently have left is my Porsche. and, the thought of crawling into the cockpit of that small vehicle is very uncomfortable for me – literally because my ribs hurt like blazes, and I still see that jeep baring down on my every time we pull up to a stop sign or light. and, I have over two thousand emails (that’s the number that got passed my staff as priority) that I need to pile through just to be ready for a return to work today.

look Ma, no hands.

peace be to my Brothers and Sisters.

brian patrick cork

if you’ve ever read any of the Dune books, a series by Frank Hebert, you know that we:

“…must face our fears, and do it anyway”.

it might also help to understand that fear is an emotion that exists to give any of us an edge in terms of what we need to do. that fear, sense, or feeling is instinct speaking to you, maybe something like a whisper tickling the nerves at the base of your skull.

I look in the mirror daily, and whether I like what I see or not, and if I’m honest, I get frightened (I never use the word scared) most days. but, I try to use that as some form of advantage.

by the way… go read Rhinocerous Success by Scott Alexander. do it!

mr. Alexnder probably did not say this, but I know Grandad did:

“I don’t sweat the details, so much. for me the important stuff involves following your dreams and looking after your true friends”.

peace be to my Brothers and Sisters.

brian patrick cork

so…

we were awoke around one am today realizing a parents worst nightmare (okay… in fairness any one of an awfully long list). our fourteen year old daughter Haley Anne had come crashing into the bedroom howling and bent double in agony, tears streaming down her tortured face.

Haley anne is still at Children’s Hospital with her Mom undergoing a mounting number of tests, and on a morphine drip. it was left to me to get Emma Jo off to school and explain why Mommy and Sissy were not about for the routine.

why is it God makes men like myself so strong physically, but so weak emotionally when it comes to my daughters?

following was part of an email I received (along with a lot of other people), yesterday, that, although generally unrelated to the current plight of my own family, offers terrific perspective.

…this is all I can muster, today.

“I’ll leave you with one last prayer request…

it expresses things in such an elegant manner that given my own anxiety I’ll just surrender my will and efforts to God and the gifted author of these words:

When you dodge a bullet like this, it’s incredibly easy for its ripple to fade quickly. There are mountains of mundane, everyday novelties and necessities just waiting to gobble up all of that fresh perspective you had when danger was so near. That quickening sense of what’s truly important is already starting to fade. I would really love to be able to keep first things first without an immanent threat closing in on me. Wisdom usually doesn’t come easily or without some expense. I’d ask for us – and for you – that God would remind us each how to live well and love well, even more so because we’ve been given the grace of a good report.

If you live in a house and have clothes and aren’t wondering where you’re next meal is coming from, you’re incredibly blessed. If you have any friends or family, BONUS! It’s so easy to get caught up focusing on how to pay for the house, whether the clothes are fashionable and the food fattening. Don’t waste your energy on worry. Just take a minute to say, “Wow. I get to spend another day with people I love. Thanks, God.”

Yes, there are bills to pay, rooms to clean, cars to fix, trash to take out, messes to clean up and hard conversations to have. But underneath all the stuff we catch ourselves complaining about is something we would be destitute without: life. Whatever your biggest problem is today, there are at least a million people on the planet who would give their right arm to be you. Be bold, be grateful, be honest, be humble. Be yourself and enjoy it.”

peace be to my Brothers and Sisters.

brian patrick cork

rain does not make a lot of sense.

it rarely comes when we need it. and, it’s almost always certain to appear when most inconvenient.

that makes rain rather like surprises.

and, change.

I hate rain. and, naturally, I love rain.

rain is bad. rain is good.

I prefer to run in the rain; a down pour, please.

that might be where pain meets ecstasy.

perhaps rain, like most things, is what we make of it.

so, I’m listening to U2 and Running to Stand Still.

me? I’m running to the light.

peace be to my brothers and sisters.

brian patrick cork