The Unsinkable brian cork™

Brian Patrick Cork is living the Authentic Life

50 Cent worth of Transitions

January20

I am not racist.

But, everyone is so excited about our new black President, and I feel compelled to be controversial.

Obama and 50 Cent /1 are being identified as two iconic figures that will (seriously) set the bar for black youth.

By the way…  I believe they can set the bar for us all. Both men are charismatic leaders that know how to deliver a message with a punch.

I am optimistic.

But, lets remember why we are so thrilled to see men such as this rise.

NOTE:  I freely admit that from time-to-time I do say things that others have the common sense not to.

Or, I care about everyone (anyone) enough to point things out that that can be resolved.

Opinionated?

Possibly.

But, the following is satire (it’s just painful)…
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In a decision that’s expected to send shockwaves through the African-American community – and yet, give much relief to teachers everywhere – a federal judge ruled today that black women no longer have independent naming rights for their children. Too many black children – and, many adults – bear names that border on not even being words, he said.   

“I am simply tired of these ridiculous names black women are giving their children,” said U.S. Federal Judge Ryan Cabrera before rendering his decision.

“Someone had to put a stop to it.”

The rule applies to all black women, but Cabrera singled out impoverished mothers.             

“They are the worst perpetrators,” he said. “They put in apostrophes where none are needed. They think a ‘Q’ is a must. There was a time when Shaniqua and Tawanda were names you dreaded. Now, if you’re a black girl, you hope you get a name as sensible as one of those.”

Few stepped forward to defend black women – and, black women themselves seemed relieved.

“It’s so hard to keep coming up with something unique,”said Uneeqqi Jenkins, 22, an African-American mother of seven who survives on public assistance. Her children are named Daryl, Q’Antity, Uhlleejsha, Cray-Ig, Fellisittee, Tay’Sh’awn and Day’Shawndra.

Beginning in one week, at least two white people, an Asian, Hispanic, and Native American must agree with the name before a black mother can name her child (unless it is previously approved by Emily Poste).              

“Hopefully we can see a lot more black children with sensible names like Jake and Connor,” Cabrera said.

His ruling stemmed from a lawsuit brought by a 13-year-old girl whose mother created her name using Incan hieroglyphics.

“She said it would make me stand out,” said the girl, whose name can’t be reproduced by The Peoples News’ technology. “But it’s really just stupid.”

The National Association of Elementary School Teachers celebrated Cabrera’s decision.

cartoon | unsinkable brian cork“Oh my God, the first day of school you’d be standing there sweating, looking at the list of names wondering ‘How do I pronounce Q’J’Q’Sha.’?” said Joyce Harmon, NAEST spokeswoman. “Is this even English?”

The practice of giving black children outlandish names began in the 1960s, when blacks were getting in touch with their African roots, said historian Corlione Vest. But even he admits it got out of hand.

“I have a niece who’s six. I’m embarrassed to say I can’t even pronounce her name,” said Vest, a professor at Princeton University. “Whenever I want to talk to her, I just wait until she looks at me and then I wave her over.”

Cabrera’s ruling exempted black men because so few of them are actually involved in their children’s lives.

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barack-obama-votes-for-brian-cork1Barack Obama is sworn into office today.

Lead on Mr. President.

But, don’t forget to listen to 50 Cent from time-to-time.

“Hate it or Love it” by 50 Cent.

Peace be to my Brothers and Sisters.

Brian Patrick Cork

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1/ Curtis James Jackson III (born July 6, 1975),better known by his stage name 50 Cent, is an American rapper. He rose to fame with the release of his albums Get Rich or Die Tryin’ (2003) and The Massacre (2005). Both albums achieved multi-platinum success, selling over twenty-one million copies combined.

NOTE:  Brian also has a business Blog that apparently fascinates world leaders and decision-makers alike (but, few others). It can be viewed and relished at: The Human Capital Blog.

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What’s All This About?

"What am I looking at?", you might wonder.

Lots of stuff.

Meanwhile, here, I discuss events, people and things in our world - and, my (hardly simplistic, albeit inarticulate) views around them.

You'll also learn things about, well, things, like people you need to know about, and information about companies you can't find anywhere else.

So, while I harangue the public in my not so gentle way, you will discover that I am fascinated by all things arcane, curious about those whom appear religious, love music, dabble in politics, loathe the media, value education, still think I am an athlete, and might offer a recipe.

All the while, striving mightily, and daily, to remain a prudent and optimistic gentleman - and, authentic.

brian cork by John Campbell





photos by John Campbell

 

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